Resuscitate
by whisperingmist
Summary: His smiles are like the sun, brightening her dark world. Her smiles are life itself, resuscitating him from the depths of despair. -Akashi x Momoi- Childhood friends! AU
1. Chapter 1

**AN - This is predominantly a friendshi** **p based fic, with slight hints of romance. The romance is primarily AkaMomo. It's one of my favourite works, so I hope you'll find it the same.**

 **DISCLAIMER - KNB isn't mine.**

* * *

They first meet when they are three.

* * *

"Dai-chan! Don't be mean!"

Seijuurou looks up. A blue haired boy is being tugged by a pink haired girl. The boy is resisting half-heartedly, but the girl looks fiercely determined to get him to do whatever it is that she wants him to do.

Seijuurou decides he likes her.

A few days later, he notices the pink haired girl sitting alone in a corner, with only her coloring book for company. None of the girls approach her and the boys are too busy to notice she's alone anyway.

He walks up to her.

She looks up, surprise evident in her pink eyes and pink cheeks.

She looks like a bundle of pink fluff.

He smiles at her, (his best smile, the one that gets his mother's friends cooing in delight about how charming he is) and offers her his Batman toy. The girl looks at his toy and then at him quizzically.

"Let's play together."

The frown clears up and she smiles.

(He fell for her that day, not that he knew it then.)

Later, he finds out that 'Dai-chan' has caught a nasty flu and is confined to his bed and fluids, something Momoi (the pink haired girl is Momoi, how ironic) takes great pleasure in.

"Serves him right," she tells him vehemently, but he can see she's lonely without the blue haired boy.

"Be my friend," the words come out without hesitation, without conscious thought, but he does not regret them.

Momoi blushes. "Silly. Boys and girls can't be friends."

When he cocks his head to one side in puzzlement, her blush deepens. "Dai-chan is different. He's.. Dai-chan."

Seijuurou does not know why the words disturb him then, but they do.

Dai-chan is definitely... Dai-chan as Seijuurou finds out when Aomine Daiki (christened by Momoi as Dai-chan) returns to school the next day.

He's loud, rude, obnoxious and arrogant.

He's also fiercely protective of Momoi, something that Seijuurou approves of. In fact, it's Aomine Daiki's only redeeming feature.

The unlikely trio, remain together, partly because Seijuurou wants to stay nearby Momoi and Momoi goes hardly anywhere without her beloved Dai-chan.

Aomine for all his protests, seeks them out on his own, and then pretends to ignore them when Seijuurou knows he has one ear on their conversation.

They stay together, play together, cry together (this applies to only Momoi as the boys apparently don't cry. Momoi, however, begs to differ) and eat together. They don't promise to _be_ together.

Kindergarten is over, and those unspoken promises are forgotten as they step into different elememtaries.

(Perhaps that's why they remained unspoken.)

Elementary passes without issue, at least for the other two.

Seijuurou, however, loses his only support in the world, and a part of himself in the process.

* * *

Teiko Junior High.

 _A hundred wars, a hundred victories._

Seijuurou surveys the building with a slight frown. He hopes Junior High will be different.

"And now the first string members, #7 Aomine Daiki, #4 Midorima Shintarou, #25 Murasakibara Atsushi, and #27 Akashi Seijuurou. That's all."

"A-Akashi?!"

"Aomine."

The rest of the first string stare in surprise at the two boys that are almost polar opposites, as they look at each other with undisguised affection.

"Man, Satsuki's gonna be pumped."

Seijuurou smiles. "I look forward to it."

Satsuki is more than 'pumped'. She bawls at the sight of Seijuurou and runs over to him and hugs him tightly. Aomine looks amused at the surprised expression on his face.

"Sei-kun, why didn't you call us? Where were you? We missed you, Dai-chan even cried -"

"Oi, Satsuki!"

Seijuurou smiles at his friends. "It's good to be back."

It _is_ good to be back.

* * *

Life goes on, in a whirl of basketball, convenience store ices, laughter and jokes.

(The tears come much, much later.)

Satsuki, Aomine and Akashi become inseparable.

The three come together to class, leave together and are generally stuck at the hips, much to the jealousy of the other girls at Teiko.

Satsuki stares as the first string boys practice, feeling a surge of pride at seeing Akashi pass seamlessly and Aomine dunk like he is born for it.

"Good practice, you guys!" she tells them, as she hands them a towel. They take it, Akashi with a smile and a thanks, Aomine with a grunt.

"Let's hang out after school!" she tells them cheerily and Akashi nods at her, whereas Aomine mutters something that sounds suspiciously like, "As if I have a choice."

She waits for them dutifully at the gates.

They come out, chattering aimlessly. She gives them a fond grin as she links her arms with them.

They fall into step, as they always have, and Satsuki thinks that it's wonderful to have friends like this.

* * *

Everything changes when Kuroko Tetsuya enters the picture.

For one, Akashi seems endlessly fascinated with him and Aomine considers him a friend in a matter of seconds.

Kuroko Tetsuya is an enigma.

She never quite knows what to make of him. His quiet presence should be unsettling, instead it's comforting. She sees worldly wisdom in those cool blue eyes, and they strongly remind her of Akashi's eyes. They're different, however. Whereas Akashi's fiery red eyes can become chilling at times, Kuroko's icy blue eyes remain infinitely warm.

She should have recognised the signs then, but in retrospect, it's harder to realise the exact moment these things happen.

Second year comes, and it is only the beginning of the end.

Nijimura-senpai steps down. Akashi becomes Captain.

Satsuki is troubled when she finds herself unable to be happy for her friend. Perhaps it was the closed off look in his eyes when he informed them the news, or perhaps Haizaki's sudden resignation from the club, whatever it is, it makes Satsuki uneasy.

Aomine is becoming increasingly disillusioned about the prospect of finding a worthy rival and Satsuki prays for a miracle, and that's when he appears.

Kise Ryouta arrives and Satsuki thinks her prayers have been answered.

He's amazing, this Kise, who can copy a move with a glance.

He seamlessly integrates himself into the impenetrable circle of Kuroko, Aomine and Momoi.

Akashi is already forgotten but she doesn't realise it.

Soon after, Aomine and Kuroko begin to have problems and her heart aches to see them like this, especially the kind-hearted Kuroko.

It's only when Akashi requests her presence for a tactical discussion does the issue come up. They talk nothing but strategy for about an hour, but an accidental glance at her wristwatch has her gasping in surprise.

"Ah, Akashi-kun, it's late. I should go!"

Akashi gives her an unreadable look. "Yes, of course Momoi. I'm sorry for keeping you."

He bows and makes to leave and that's when she realises how wrong 'Momoi' sounds when coming from his mouth. She catches the sleeve of his shirt before he can leave and resolutely refuses to blush at her forwardness.

"Sei-kun, I'm sorry. I-" the tears are falling in earnest now, "I've been a terrible friend haven't I? It's just Dai-chan and Tetsu-kun are.." The words are spilling before she can stop them and Akashi pulls her towards him, softly caressing her hair and sinks to the floor.

Momoi adjusts herself and continues talking. Akashi doesn't interrupt her, just keeps rubbing her back softly and she's happy he's there. She's happy it's him she's baring her soul to.

He remains silent for a while.

"The Generation of Miracles, that's what they call us you know."

Momoi looks at him. His face is impassive but his eyes are troubled. She feels immeasurably guilty at not being there for him, because even though he is a natural leader, it can't be as easy as he makes it look.

He looks at her then, and she's suddenly aware of the fact that he's a boy and she's a girl. Pink stains her cheeks, and as she looks at him through lowered lashes, she realises he's not looking at her anymore. She feels cold, despite being surrounded by warmth.

She gets up from the protective embrace he has over her and he lets her go easily. They stand up, she avoids his eyes, so she doesn't know whether or not he's looking at her.

"Satsuki. Take care. Of both Aomine and Kuroko."

Satsuki nods and vows to take care of him too.

* * *

It's a fateful day, the day that the Generation of Miracles completely fractured, but Satsuki is unaware of that at the moment.

At the moment, she is thinking about how quickly the team is growing ever since the senpai have left. She thinks of Midorima practicing full court shots, Murasakibara blocking dunks without moving, Aomine going from coast to coast, and Kise no far behind.

She thinks of Akashi's worried red eyes as he takes in their strength.

She thinks of Kuroko's blank stare when Aomine refuses him a fist bump.

She is so lost in her thoughts that she doesn't realise Murasakibara is openly challenging Akashi. When she does, she rushes to his aid, only to be harshly pushed away.

She watches her friend lose basket after basket. She watches as he stops and stands still for a moment and then suddenly it is like a whole different person standing in front of her. She has seen hints of this person, but she never knew. She never knew it would come this far.

(Who is she kidding, she _knew_ this would happen someday, that Sei-kun would _snap_ -)

She watches as he utters those words that she knew would never come from his mouth.

"I, who always win, am always right."

She realises then that this is not the Akashi she knew, not her Sei-kun. This is not the boy she grew up with.

This is the boy she has seen fleeting glimpses of, the boy she accepted as part of her friend, the part she never quite knew how to deal with, the part of Akashi that thought people were pretty toys to be used as fit and discarded when unneeded. She never thought he would completely replace her friend.

She can only stare in disbelief as Akashi _slaughters_ Murasakibara and lands coolly on his feet as if he had just been out on a stroll. And then-

"All actions will be glossed over as long as you bring results. You need not come to practice anymore. Team play is just a hindrance to the Generation of Miracles."

And she realises her Akashi is lost, probably forever.

* * *

Choosing a high school should be hard, but it's not. She follows Aomine.

She looks at Akashi to see if he is hurt by her decision (During one of their 'tactical discussions' Akashi expressed his sentiments about how he knew she'd follow Aomine to the ends of the world. She'd so wanted to prove him wrong, but as he says these days - He is absolute after all) but he's too busy winning and being absolute to care much about her decision at all.

In fact, if she didn't know about his way knowing things he was never supposed to, she'd think he didn't know which school she was going to.

As always, he proves her wrong by walking up to her on graduation and telling her to do her best in Touou.

She smiles, nods.

(He calls her Satsuki, but not the way he used to.)

Touou is hardly any different from Teiko.

Aomine is exempted from practice, she's exempted from cooking. She thinks there are worse cooks than her, but no one agrees.

Life is whirl of basketball, convenience store ices and tears.

(The laughter is missing- how can she laugh without him?)

Aomine tells her to stop being dramatic one day. "He doesn't care, Satsuki. He doesn't care you're crying or whatever shit that you're doing. He's busy being the best. I don't think he even he loved basketball-" and Momoi slaps him.

Aomine's eyes widen but he says nothing.

"How can you say that? How can you look into my eyes and say Akashi-kun didn't love basketball?" Her voice is steady, but her body is trembling with suppressed sobs.

Aomine shakes his head. "Satsuki, he abandoned me," Satsuki flinches at the blunt words, "He abandoned me and you know it. He thinks I'm worth nothing. So get it through your thick skull."

That's not it at all, you stupid Aomine-kun, Satsuki wants to say, but she doesn't. Aomine can be incredibly self-centred, but he was always a loyal friend. Did he honestly not notice the change that came over Akashi?

She broaches the subject one day.

His reply is a simple shrug, but his eyes are sad. That's when she realises, he wasn't being self-centred at all, she was the self-centred one. How busy wallowing in her misery she was, that she didn't see what was right in front of her? Because what she sees in Aomine's eyes is unmistakable hurt. He's hurt Akashi became a person he doesn't know anything about, hurt that he abandoned him.

Satsuki vows that day, to bring back the old Akashi-kun, her Sei-kun, even if it killed her.

She makes winning strategies and makes the team bentos. The former are appreciated, the latter not so much. Well, at least she tries.

Inter High comes and there are no surprising upsets, at least not according to her. She and Akashi were the only ones who never underestimated Kuroko, or his skills. Learning the outcome of the Shuutoku vs Seirin match, she yearns for Akashi almost fiercely, and she imagines the victorious glint in his eyes as he says, "Of course, Kuroko would never disappoint me Satsuki."

Aomine is quizzical, because Kuroko cannot shine without a light. Satsuki knows he's curious, wondering about who the new light is. Satsuki tells him without him asking.

"His name is Kagami Taiga. He is a transfer student from the US."

She has to suppress a grin when he murmurs something like never asking for the information.

Sometimes she wonders who is more of a tsundere, Midorima or Aomine.

Touou breezes through the Inter High preliminaries as expected.

Quarter finals have them facing Kaijou and once upon a time, Momoi would have bet her life on Aomine, but now she's not sure.

Kise's growth potential is enormous and Aomine hasn't been practicing for over a year.

Still Aomine repeats things like 'the only who can beat me is me.'

Things look grim by the end of third quarter, she didn't expect Kise to learn Aomine's techniques so quickly. But they weren't called the Generation of Miracles for nothing, they were the only ones she couldn't predict with 100% accuracy.

She wishes, hopes, prays that Aomine loses and hates herself for it.

Maybe because she's a terrible friend, her wish is not granted. Aomine wins like he always does, if anything, his ego seems to have inflated further. Nobody can deny his leg is injured though.

Momoi thinks that he's not foolish enough to play against Akashi with an injured leg, but he proves her wrong.

She resorts to tattling about her best friend to the coach, and she blames herself, Aomine, Akashi, the skies and the rain for putting her in this position.

Aomine is understandably furious. It is nothing she didn't expect. It still hurts when he lashes out at her, though. She knows she's being selfish, but her heart cannot take any more pain and the most ultimate pain of all would be her childhood best friends facing off against each other.

"I could have won! We could have won, and maybe... maybe he would have changed!" is what Aomine tells her, and she runs into the rain, tears streaming down her eyes.

What a selfish, selfish person she is. Moping in a corner when Aomine is trying his hardest to bring back Akashi. She runs to the only person left with any sense, because if anything Kuroko always was too sensible.

He is as considerate as ever, even when she glomps him in her haste to feel some semblance of normalcy in her chaotic world. When had things gone so wrong? They were 16 and supposed to be playing basketball. Not.. doing whatever they were doing right now.

"Momoi-san, you did a good thing. Playing with an injury against Akashi-kun is very dangerous. I understand why Aomine-kun is eager to play, but I'm glad you stopped him."

Kuroko comforts her in the only way he knows how, the only way she needs - he vows to defeat Aomine. She can only pray, hope, wish that he does it, because how can he defeat Akashi if he can't defeat Aomine?

* * *

The gap between the Inter High and Winter Cup is too great for Aomine to sit still. He still refuses to come to practices, but Satsuki is working on it. It's a good thing though, this gap. It helps Satsuki bring Aomine's failing grades up.

She misses Akashi. She hasn't seen him since the Inter High, and even then she hadn't been acknowledged by him.

The Winter Cup opening ceremony begins with a stab and soft strands of red falling. Satsuki stares at the boy she grew up with cut his hair with the same scissors that had almost taken Kagami's eye out.

"In this world," he says in that cool tenor of his, "winners are affirmed completely and losers are denied completely. I've never lost at anything in life and I never will. Because I always win, I'm always right. Know your place."

Satsuki has an inkling of what is going on through the red head's mind. She also thinks she knows how to bring her Sei-kun back.

Winter Cup is a surprise unto itself.

It's Touou vs Seirin in round one, and Satsuki cannot imagine how Seirin can win, even with Kuroko's new drive. Satsuki forgets about Kagami Taiga, so set she's on Kuroko, and Kuroko is the perfect shadow, shielding her eyes from his light until it's too late.

It's too late by the time she realises she doesn't want Aomine to lose, too late because by the time Kuroko unveils his light, Kagami Taiga has a glint in his eye, the same glint that she's only seen when Aomine plays seriously.

The Zone is ridiculous, is what Satsuki wants to think.

She's been with Aomine her whole life and never seen him play this way. It's even more amazing when Kagami enters the Zone. It's truly a battle between monsters. She wonders why she never noticed this raw potential in Kagami. He's a worthy rival for Aomine.

The match ends on a preposterous 101-100. Seirin wins.

Seeing the result of the match makes her realise, that she truly had underestimated Kuroko. She never expected him to beat Aomine. Aomine's declaration of buying shoes for practice makes her heart soar though. And she can't help but hope, that Aomine's words in middle school were right and that Kuroko is going to save them all.

He has to.

The other matches proceed as expected. Akashi comes to watch the quarter finals. She notices him before she even knows she's looking for him. It's not very hard, his red hair shines like a beacon in the sea.

She doesn't know if he sees her. She wants to talk to him, but she's afraid of what she'll see, or rather what she _won't_.

Quarter final proceeds as Seirin games always do, unexpected and thrilling. Seirin wins against Yosen and she decides to find Akashi.

She runs out of the stadium, ignoring Aomine's panicked shout of "Satsuki!", searching for that radiant mop of fire red hair.

She finds him walking with his teammates. Seeing him walk like a king with that No.4 jersey, those colors so similar to Teiko, brings back memories. Memories that apparently break her brain-mouth filter, because she's shouting his name before she can stop herself.

He turns around with all the grace of an Emperor.

She finds words and tears clogging her throat, fighting to come out. She wants to tell him so many things, ask him so much.

He smiles at her then, and only then does she realise how much she has truly lost, because it's him and it's not him. His smile is the same, yet all wrong, like a familiar tune coming from a staticky radio.

She forces a smile back.

"Akashi-kun, why didn't you stay in touch?"

His teammates are looking at him quizzically, and he banishes them a look. He then turns to her, eyes cool, and asks her, "Why didn't _you_?"

She finds this outrageous. "You changed your number, moved to Kyoto and didn't even tell me anything about wanting to stay in touch. What am I supposed to think? I thought you didn't want to stay in touch!"

The pleasant smile playing on his lips is anything but pleasant. Has he always had this much presence, Satsuki wonders. His presence is absolutely oppressing. He has a satisfied look, like a cat that ate the cream, and Satsuki finds herself disliking it.

"Hmm," he says and looks at her. She finds herself hating his smile more and more and as the silence stretches, she seeks the comfort of words. "You changed." She doesn't mean to say it so accusingly, but it is what it is.

His smile widens, and she wonders for a moment if she has fallen into a trap. But how can he lay out a trap by talking all of four words? And how terrible she must be, thinking of him that way? No wonder he left.

"Yes, I changed," his admission is shocking, so is the amusement in his eyes, "but then," he looks devious at this point, "so did you."

Satsuki is confused. She thought he would deny it, make some phony excuse. Looking at him, standing in front of her, honestly proclaiming he changed, it is difficult to accept it.

She bites her lower lip. She is truly at a loss, as to how to approach this changed Akashi. She can feel his stare on her, something he never used to do before, and she finds it distracting.

Coming to a decision, she looks up. She is surprised to see the look in his eyes, they are intensely calculating. She has seen this look in Akashi's eyes, but never directed at her. She feels uneasy, but decides to shrug it off for the moment.

"Yes, well it doesn't matter whether you change or not. You're still my friend. You're still Dai-chan's friend. I want us to be together. Please stay in touch. Don't disappear like you always do."

He looks at her for a moment.

"Friendship is unnecessary for victory. Thank you for the offer, but I must decline."

Satsuki is shocked. What is _wrong_ with this boy?

Before she can respond, he's walking away.

She won't. She won't let him walk away like before. She will stop him, and whoever this is, he's still Akashi-kun. He's still her Sei-kun.

She runs up to him and catches hold of his sleeve, deja-vu shaking her hard. That time, he'd comforted her.

Now, he takes in her hand on his sleeve, and looks at her tear-streaked, flushed face.

"What is it that you desire from me, Momoi Satsuki? Are you after information? Or perhaps," he leans closer and she flinches, "you're after something else?"

She hates the implications in his voice and she wants to punch him. How dare he? How dare he talk that way about them? Why is he purposely cheapening their friendship?

He leans back to survey her defiant face with a smug look on her face and she realises. She realises she's playing right into his hands by acting this way. By revealing her emotions to him, she's making herself vulnerable to him. He's pushing her away for a reason and she will find it even if it kills her.

She swipes at her tears and looks at him.

"I'm sorry, Akashi-kun. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you were obviously facing difficulties, and for being a poor friend. I paid too much attention to Dai-chan. I ignored you. I shouldn't have done that. I understand if you'll never want to talk to me again, but I'm hoping you will."

With a final bow she walks away, and doesn't hear Akashi's whisper.

"You never did give up, did you, Satsuki? You're so like Tetsuya that way."

Aomine thoroughly reprimands her for ditching him like that, but she knows that he was worried. She doesn't tell him about meeting Akashi and he doesn't ask.

* * *

She watches Rakuzan vs Shuutoku with awe. She never knew Akashi played like that, so perfectly, so amazingly well. He is just as good as Aomine, if not better. His position hadn't allowed him to be fancy in Teiko, but his flair for dramatics is showing through in this match, as he performs perfect passes and ankle breaks anyone in his vicinity.

It is amazing seeing him dominate the court like that, despite being the smallest player on court.

The outcome is as expected.

Rakuzan wins.

She waits for him near the lockers, despite the Kaijou vs Seirin match starting. She wants to see him.

He is shirtless with a towel slung casually over his shoulder and his hair is dripping wet.

Satsuki tries to stop herself from blushing, but it's hard. She berates herself mentally, it's nothing you haven't seen before, but then a sneaky voice whispers in her mind _you were twelve then, you're sixteen now_.

He looks surprised to her see for a moment, then the shutters fall down, and she can't see what he's thinking at all.

"Satsuki." His voice is cold and Satsuki forces herself to stay, to not run away like the coward she has been acting like. What is there to be scared of anyway? It's Akashi.

"Good game, Akashi-kun. You played very well."

He's still looking at her expectantly and she swallows.

"Will you watch the Seirin game with me?"

With me? Idiot, idiot, idiot. It was supposed to be us. Not me. Satsuki's mind is a mess. She blames Akashi and all of that lean, sinewy skin that is on display. She determinedly avoids looking at him.

So she's surprised when she feels long fingers on her chin, lifting her face up. She looks up and meets his eyes, and she can only think, was he always this handsome?

"I'm sorry, I'll have to reject that offer."

Satsuki reels back as if she is slapped.

"I keep telling you Momoi Satsuki, not to push me, but you never give up do you? Go away before I do something I will truly regret." His voice is soft but venomous.

Satsuki stands her ground. She will not be intimidated by a guy who used to cry and refused to eat seaweed because it was 'icky'. She's Momoi Satsuki, the girl whom all the teams were terrified of, because of her precognitive defense.

She hugs him and as he goes stiff, she realises it's the absolute last thing he could have expected her to do. "I miss you, Sei-kun," she tells him, voice muffled. Then she turns and runs away, feeling like an idiot and hardly precognitive.

Kaijou vs Seirin is heartbreaking. Kise was always her favourite after Akashi, Aomine and Kuroko. She grins as she realises how that sounded. She quickly sobers up as she realises Kise is probably sporting a career ending injury.

Kaijou cannot help Kise and Kise however great he is, is still not great enough to win a match without his teammates. Seirin predicts Kise's Perfect Copy, and they win beautifully. Satsuki suspects that Kuroko is behind the prediction as he's always been observant. She is eerily reminded of Akashi's Emperor Eye, but dismisses the thought.

The next day is the final, she thinks.

The make or break match.

* * *

Satsuki wakes up early on the day of the match. Not that she ever sleeps. She can hardly contain her emotions, she feels like she's just gotten off a roller coaster.

Her breakfast is uneventful, with Aomine joining in. They go to the nearby basketball court and she watches as Aomine shoots some hoops. She can tell his heart isn't in it, though, from the way he tosses the ball in without dribbling. She supposes both of them are more invested in today's game than they'd like to show.

They go to the stadium.

They half-heartedly watch the Kaijou vs Shuutoku match, and keep looking at the time, waiting impatiently for Rakuzan vs Seirin to begin.

Kagami goes for the tip-off in an unexpected turn of events and gets the ball. Seirin starts.

From then on the match is a whirlwind of emotions. Akashi crushes Kuroko but Satsuki does not despair. Kuroko is stronger than he looks.

She watches as Kuroko makes his comeback, overwriting the Rakuzan shadow. Kuroko is unbeatable at being a shadow. Then, Akashi enters the Zone.

It's like watching a deadly dance, Akashi's Zone. Why it feels deadly, she'll never know, it's only basketball after all. But it was never only basketball with Akashi was it?

He _destroys_ everyone in his way, friend or foe alike.

She looks at his lithe form as he tears through the court like a lion, and hopes for a miracle.

Because that's what they all are, aren't they? The Miracle kids.

Of all people who she wanted miracles from, Kuroko Tetsuya is the last one she has in mind.

But that's Kuroko isn't he, always doing the impossible.

Akashi is defeated. Oh no, not completely. Just his Zone. But that's enough for him to snap and break. Her heart shatters as she watches him stumble around the court like a lost child and suddenly she wants to scream.

Aomine holds her back. With a soft shake of his head, she understands. It'll all be for naught if Kuroko does not win. She needs Kuroko to win.

Then she notices something.

The way Akashi is playing is suddenly different. He begins passing to his teammates and she lets out a sharp gasp.

It's _him._

Aomine's hand is a vice against her own and she realises it's true. He's back. Her Sei-kun is back. She waits with bated breath for them to finish the match, she hardly cares how it ends, he is back back back and that's what is important and she's never letting him go anywhere.

She runs to the locker room once the results are announced (Seirin won apparently) and waits for him.

His red head is bent, his teammates look dejected. She's never seen him like this. She's never seen Akashi Seijuurou after he lost, because Akashi Seijuurou doesn't lose.

She can't stand the kicked puppy demeanour surrounding him, so she calls him out.

"Sei-kun?"

He looks up.

And his face breaks out into a beautiful smile, like the sun shining after the rain and she realises that's what it is. He's her sun and it's been constant rain rain rain in her life since he left.

He's her sun.

She runs to him and hugs him.

The tears are falling but they're happy tears, it's a summer rain, the sun's still there. He's still there.

"Welcome back, Sei-kun."

She can feel his lips curve into a smile against her hair.

"It's good to be back, Satsuki."

They both fell for each other's smiles, she was just thirteen years late realising it.

* * *

 **AN: Please review if you liked it. I'm also working on an Akashi POV, so I'm marking this as incomplete. :) I'm also taking prompts on my tumblr, my account is .com, please remove the brackets!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Author Notes - here's chapter 2! Akashi POV.**

 **DISCLAIMER - KNB isn't mine. I wouldn't mind an Akashi plushie tho.**

* * *

First year of middle school is the best year of his life.

For the first time in his life, Seijuurou has friends, friends who don't expect anything from him but give everything to him.

He thinks it's too good to be true, but berates himself for being cynical about the sole good thing in his life. He vows to enjoy it to the fullest.

(Because it can't last.)

It's quite a surprise when Aomine calls him when he's in the middle of a shogi match with himself. In fact, it's the sheer bewilderment at the caller's identity that propels him to attend that call.

He does not regret it.

"Yo, Akashi. I wanna play basketball."

He goes to the designated meeting spot on time, a rare feat for him. Aomine is also on time, another rare feat.

They play basketball.

"One-on-one, first to five baskets!"

"I will win, I assure you."

"Hah! The only one who can beat me is me!"

After ten minutes, they stop keeping score. It's pure unadulterated fun, something Seijuurou hasn't felt in a long time.

Later on, when they're sweaty and exhausted, Seijuurou asks Aomine why he called him.

"Huh. You're the only guy I know, who plays basketball and can give me a challenge. Anyway I've been spending way too much time with Satsuki. I feel like I'll grow boobs if I've to listen to any more of her blather about shampoos and perfumes."

Seijuurou snorts. Aomine guffaws.

They look at each other and begin laughing like idiots. Aomine imitates Seijuurou's laugh and that sets off another round of giggles. They laugh until tears flow, until their stomachs hurt from the sheer force of their laughter.

They walk home with smiles, an unspoken promise to do this again.

Akashi waits for Aomine's calls after that.

* * *

"Yo, Akashi."

"I'll be there."

* * *

Their games change.

"Who dunks most wins!"

"Are you implying I cannot dunk?"

"Of course you can't! You're what 5'2? No way you can dunk."

Seijuurou wins as he always does and instead of being in awe of him, Aomine tackles him to the ground and examines his legs.

"Please get off my person."

Aomine looks at him, brows furrowed. "Do you have some springs attached to those shoes or some fancy shit like that?"

Seijuurou raises an eyebrow. "I don't cheat to win."

Aomine 'hmms', and looks at him contemplatively. The expression unsettles Seijuurou, which is perhaps why he suggests what he does.

"I could teach you."

Aomine's eyes sparkle. "Cool!"

* * *

Their games go on.

"Defense."

"Borrrrring. Man, Akashi you sure come up with dumb shit."

"Defense."

"Fineeeee. Don't nag. But I won't go easy on you."

Seijuurou smiles. "You should know by now, that you don't have to."

Aomine throws his head back and laughs.

* * *

The days blur into one another.

"Akashi-kun, can you-"

"Satsuki, why are you calling me that?"

Satsuki looks bewildered. "Uh, because that's your name?"

Seijuurou frowns. Satsuki blushes. "Um, it's because we're in middle school and people will talk, won't they?"

He raises an eyebrow. "Will they? I'll make sure that they won't then. You will not change my form of address for such a petty reason."

Satsuki looks at him for a moment. Then she nods. "Yes, Sei-kun."

* * *

Second year is stressful. Not for him. For his teammates.

They're attaining their potentials way too early and their bodies cannot cope up. More than once injuries plague them, especially Aomine whose recklessness knows no bounds.

"Aomine, that's your fourth injury in three months. I will have to postpone our street basketball until you're completely fit."

Aomine looks irritated. "Fine, fine."

He nods at Aomine and walks off, only to run into Nijimura. Nijimura holds a special place in his heart. He is one of the few persons Seijuurou looks upto.

Nijimura smiles at him affectionately. "What's up, brat?"

He smiles back. "Nothing much, just Aomine and his injuries."

Nijimura looks thoughtful. "He's been getting a lot of injuries, huh? Even that Haizaki brat has been the same. I should really talk to those two."

Seijuurou nods, but something nags him in the back of his mind.

* * *

He finds a new shogi partner, seeing as he has cut short his street basketball with Aomine. Playing by yourself loses its novelty after a while.

Midorima Shintarou is hopelessly fascinated by him and he cannot help but find the other boy interesting. His obsession with stuffed animals however, leaves much to be desired.

"It's Oha-Asa, nanodayo," the boy tells him one day and Seijuurou can't help but be relieved. After all, a boy obsessed with the horoscopes and fates is better than a boy obsessed with stuffed animals.

Midorima takes up much of his time, but he still makes time for Aomine and Satsuki.

Their time together is getting progressively lesser however, because he finds that they keep making plans without informing him.

He knows it's not through any fault of theirs as he himself is busy, what with Vice-Captain duties and Student Council responsibilities.

Then one day, he stumbles upon Kuroko Tetsuya.

Kuroko Tetsuya is a diamond in the rough. His abilities are so uniquely different from their own, that Seijuurou is instantly fascinated.

He hands him the rope to climb, whether he utilises it or not is up to him.

Kuroko utilises it better than he imagines. In fact, Seijuurou can safely say that Kuroko Tetsuya is the one person who always exceeds his expectations.

Everything is fine, though he still doesn't see much of Aomine and Satsuki as they are completely occupied with Kuroko.

* * *

His and Aomine's street basketball games have completely stopped.

* * *

He takes Murasakibara under his wing, as the tall boy, for all his intimidating appearance, is quite docile when given food. Indulging Murasakibara is one of his favourite things to do, nowadays.

One day, Midorima asks him about Aomine and Satsuki.

"Weren't you three really close?"

Seijuurou looks at him. " _Ote_."

As Midorima scrambles to defend his king, he looks out the window, searching for an answer to Midorima's question. He had thought they were close too.

What fragile peace Seijuurou has is completely shattered when Nijimura steps down as Captain. He knows he's the rightful one for the position, but he does not want it.

He wants street basketball with Aomine and Satsuki's terrible bentos. He wants the sound of Satsuki's laughter and the squeaking of basketball shoes on the court.

Instead, he gets Midorima's piano playing, the cold click of shogi tiles and the crunching of Murasakibara's maiubo.

He does not mind it. At least they will not leave him.

(He knows they stay because they have nowhere to go.)

* * *

They win games, as expected.

 _(Winners are validated while losers are wiped from history.)_

* * *

Then, Kise Ryouta comes.

He is a blessing and a curse.

Haizaki and his thuggish ways can be eliminated but Kise has an annoying way of clinging to people he cares about the most.

Kuroko. Aomine. Satsuki.

He doubles Kise's practice so he's unable to hang out with the other three but immediately feels childish and petty. He decides to make it up to Kise by giving him a box of chocolates, but the boy shares it with Satsuki and what little compassion he felt for Kise is squashed to death, when he sees the two of them giggling over his chocolate.

* * *

Aomine is becoming increasingly troublesome.

He has lost motivation, that much is obvious. The why is Seijuurou's question. Why has he lost motivation? Does he think he has achieved the pinnacle of his potential? Does he lack a rival?

If only he'd pick up a phone and call Seijuurou like he used to, Seijuurou can beat some sense into that thick skull of his.

* * *

He calls for a tactical discussion with Satsuki, to discuss about their impending match with Kamata West.

She's always been lovely, and the time apart from her has made him forget his juvenile infatuation with her. It returns in full force, however, when he sees her furrow her brow and explain to him the strategy for the next match.

If he wasn't Akashi Seijuurou, he is not sure he could have made it through the meeting. He makes a mental note to never keep these meetings, ever again.

She makes a startled exclamation about how the time has gone and he finds himself fascinated by the shape of her lips.

She calls him Akashi-kun.

He calls her Momoi, to keep some distance.

But of course, fate plays it's cruel games with him.

She pulls his shirt sleeve and as tears fall from her eyes, he is lost. He comforts her the best he can, but he is not sure he does a good job, because her words trouble him.

He is scared of the expectations placed upon him.

 _A hundred wars and a hundred victories._

"Satsuki. Take care. Of both Aomine and Kuroko."

She nods and he walks away, head and heart heavy with her words.

* * *

Aomine is exempted from practice. His fury knows no bounds. What were they thinking?

He is just expressing his concern when-

"Hmm, about that~ Hey, Aka-chin, the only reason I've been coming to practice till now is because I hate losing. But if Mine-chin doesn't have to, then I don't wanna do it too~"

Seijuurou frowns. "Don't be ridiculous, I can't permit that."

"But there's no way I can lose, right? Hey Aka-chin, till now I've followed Aka-chin because I thought there's no way I can win against Aka-chin right? But now I'm not so sure."

He walks up to Seijuurou.

"I just don't want to follow someone weaker than me."

Everyone gasps.

"Wait, Mukkun, this is a joke right? I mean, you're not serious!"

It's Satsuki. Seeing her just increases his anger. He roughly pushes her away. Where was she when he needed her? He doesn't need her now.

He looks up at Murasakibara's towering figure. In the end, they've all abandoned him.

"You've become full of yourself. The Captain need not be the strongest person in the team, but for you to publicly question my authority like that, I cannot ignore you."

He picks up a basketball.

"If I have to pin you down by force, then I will do so. One-on-one. First to five baskets."

* * *

The game is unexpected.

He is completely overwhelmed by Murasakibara. He is 0 and Murasakibara is 4. He can hear the people around him whispering.

"Heh, that's all you've got?" Murasakibara sounds disappointed, "Man, I thought at least Aka-chin would be more of a challenge."

Something inside him snaps.

 _(In this world, winning is everything. Winners are affirmed completely and losers are denied completely.)_

("Seijuurou, how are your studies?

"They're fine, Father."

"And your other activities?"

"It's going smoothly, Father."

"Very well. Know this, only a man who excels in all fields is a part of the Akashi household."

"Yes, father.")

 _I, Akashi Seijuurou am going to lose...? Impossible. Such a thing must never happen. No matter who my opponent is, I must win. Because otherwise.._

"I, who always win, am always right."

He pushes the ball from Atsushi's hands. "Don't get ahead of yourself Atsushi."

Softly dropping down after making the required number of baskets, Seijuurou addresses the crowd.

"I'll kill anyone who opposes me, even if they're my parents."

Seijuurou never wanted to change, but they've forced his hand. This is the Akashi Seijuurou they'll have to deal with now.

* * *

For the most part, everything is the same. It's the basketball that's different.

He can see the entirety of the future.

It's as if time itself has slowed down, showing him a glimpse of his opponent's movements. His dribbles are fast enough to ankle break. His passes are perfect. He is perfect.

He is absolute.

(Such a thing must never happen. Nobody must ever question his authority again. He is Akashi Seijuurou. He is absolute.)

They win the Nationals by trampling on Tetsuya's friend's dreams. Seijuurou does not feel guilty, not even when he sees Tetsuya crying.

There is no victory for the weak.

* * *

Tetsuya later confronts him about the issue and he brushes it off. Because what good are dreams, when you have victory?

Tetsuya resigns and Seijuurou has to work to conceal his surprise. Tetsuya is the only one, the only thing he cannot predict, he thinks, and he suddenly remembers strawberry scented hair and a pretty smile, and he wonders whether he is as absolute as he says he is.

* * *

Graduation comes in a whirl of cherry blossoms.

He stands under the tree where the three of them always met and wishes her a good future. It's the only thing he can do anyway. He clenches the second button of his shirt tightly.

They will meet again, but as rivals. He always knew that Daiki was more important to her than him, but the truth is a bitter pill to swallow.

It matters not. He will win at everything in life, including his own emotions. He will not fall prey to something so weak.

Akashi Seijuurou is 14 when he becomes absolute.

* * *

"Rakuzan is the best high school in the country. They excel at both sports and academics. You will attend Rakuzan."

(Everyone is here in Tokyo, except Atsushi who is in Akita. Everyone's in Tokyo. Seirin, Shuutoku, Kaijou, Touou. He wants to be with everyone.)

"Yes, Father."

* * *

He is shipped off to Kyoto.

* * *

Rakuzan's motto is 'To excel in letters and in arms.'

It's still better than Teiko's.

* * *

He finds high school easier than middle school, perhaps because he has eliminated all sorts of weaknesses and has a single minded goal of victory.

* * *

He is elected Student StudentCouncil President.

(It isn't even an election. When his opponent is informed of his candidature, the boy withdraws.)

* * *

He becomes the Captain of the basketball team

(" _Monster_. He's a monster. No one can play like that. 5 on 1? _Monster_.")

* * *

His teammates are eccentric. He supposes that is something that will never change.

There is the Vice-Captain who worries about propriety, the muscle headed gluttonous Centre, the energetic Small Forward.

He wonders if fate is playing games with him, and Shintarou's face floats unbidden in his mind.

He shakes his head to clear his thoughts.

He is here to excel in letters and in arms.

He is here to win.

(Not make friends.)

* * *

Perhaps, he is charismatic. He does not know. Because why else would people refuse to leave him alone?

"Sei-chan! I've made you tofu soup." Reo grins at him, and he has to work to conceal his smile.

He eats up all of the soup and Reo fills his saucer again, without him having to ask.

It's like having a mother.

Something painful twists in his chest. He leaves the rest of the soup untouched, much to Reo's distress.

* * *

He studies, plays shogi and attends to his Council duties.

He plays very little basketball. He practices more than he ever has in his life.

(He is absolute. He must never be challenged. But if he is, he should be prepared. He must never lose.)

* * *

Inter-High is as uninteresting as ever.

A whole season goes by without him clocking a single minute of game time.

He hates Daiki for injuring himself. He could have played against Daiki. It would have alleviated the boredom. He refuses to think anymore about the matter.

He should have known Daiki would disappoint him. They all do, in the end.

* * *

Mayuzumi Chihiro's resignation surprises him because he did not know Mayuzumi Chihiro existed.

"Reo. Get me all information you can on Mayuzumi Chihiro."

* * *

He meets the elusive third year in the roof top. His presence reminds him of Tetsuya.

His words do not.

"I'm not so desperate to play that I will reduce myself to being a passing specialist."

(So what did that say about Tetsuya? Was he reducing himself? Did he sacrifice his enjoyment to play the way he did? If he did, then Tetsuya is not much different from Seijuurou himself.)

He teaches Chihiro everything he needs to, to be better than Tetsuya.

* * *

"Ano, Akashi-sama, I know I'm not capable of standing by your side, but I really like you! Will you please go out with me?"

Seijuurou wonders why the girl asks him out. For his looks, money, popularity, intelligence, or athletic prowess? He does not know.

"I'm sorry I must respectfully decline."

* * *

Life is colorless.

"Akashi-taicho, I wanted to talk to you about the Cultural Festival and the budget, it seems the Library Committee is not willing to relinquish their share and..."

His Vice-President talks. He listens.

"Takahashi Arai. President of the Library Committee," Seijuurou's smile is cold. Arai's eyes are fearful but he does not relent.

"We need the budget to update our library. The Cultural Festival can get its funds from wherever, the library isn't like that. We need these funds, you don't," his voice earnest, eager as if trying to make Seijuurou understand. As if Seijuurou doesn't understand enough.

"Hikari Aiko, do you know her?"

Arai grows white.

Seijuurou forces himself to smile.

"She confessed to me the other day," his tone is casual, his voice soft.

The boy in front of him is trembling. "Y-You -" his hands are shaking.

Seijuurou keeps smiling.

"I rejected her."

He can see the exact moment the boy loses his grip on reality. The exact moment breaks, because Seijuurou's been there before.

Arai lunges like a wild animal. It's almost pathetically easy to dodge.

He calmly turns away. "I'm afraid I'll have to report that, Takahashi-san. Rakuzan has a very strict policy on violence, and as Student Council President I cannot overlook this. Of course," his smile is a smirk now, "you'll probably be stripped off your post as Library Committee President."

Arai's look is one of despair.

* * *

"Akashi-taicho!"

Akashi turns to look at his Vice-President, who looks dishevelled.

"Akashi-taicho!" he huffs out a wheezy breath and looks up at Seijuurou with a smile. "Takahashi was removed from his position as President. The new President Yamashita-san has agreed to channel their funds and -"

Seijuurou smiles benevolently.

"How fortunate."

His Vice-President continues talking about the decorations and catering.

* * *

"Akashi-kun, please tutor Takeyama Nobuo. I'll add this as extra credit..."

Seijuurou nods, as he always does.

"I will be your tutor starting today. I do not have time to spoon feed you. You will follow what I ask you to do. I demand absolute obedience."

Takeyama Nobuo passes with flying colours.

Everyone wants something from him.

His father wants unwavering victory.

The girls around him want either his money, fame or looks.

The boys around him want him either to be their friend or their rival.

His basketball team wants him to be a ruthless Captain.

His Student Council members want him to be charming and smooth, glossing over all issues with a smile.

His teachers either resent him for knowing more than they do or worship him for the very same reason.

He carries on doing his duties with frightening precision.

All _he_ wants are his old teammates.

Shintarou who plays shogi better than the shogi Captain at Rakuzan, Atsushi who is like a child desiring nothing from him except his concern, Daiki who would challenge him to one-on-ones everytime he was free, Tetsuya and his quick, dry wit, Ryouta and his endlessly charming ways.

(Satsuki whose hair smelled like strawberries, the girl whom he dreamt about late at night when his room was so dark that he cannot see his own fingers spread in front of him. Satsuki, the girl who called him Sei-kun. Satsuki, who does not care enough to call him once.)

* * *

He sits through his exams and scores first.

(Somedays, he wants to scream.)

* * *

Shintarou sends him a request to play online shogi. He does not accept it.

(He does not reject it either.)

* * *

He moves his black rook to b8.

 _"Rook to e2."_

He sighs as he moves the white rook to e2.

He moves his king to f1.

 _"Rook to b5."_

He can almost hear the smirk in that voice in his head.

"Sei-chan? Do you need a shogi partner?"

He looks up at Reo distractedly as laughter fills his head. "No thanks, Reo. I already have one."

 _"Knight to C5 and check."_ The gloating tone is unmistakable. Seijuurou frowns as he ponders the board intensely. He might have been slightly careless (always a mistake, he was never to be taken lightly at all, not even by himself) but he would win. He would always win.

* * *

Winter Cup comes.

He texts his former teammates. He wants to see them, he wants to know if they have the same burning fire inside of them that they had at the end of middle school. He wants to know if they're as desperate as him for victory.

(Or is it loss?)

He looks at each and every eye and finds them the same as his. Changed, yet for the better.

Then that insolent child dares to interrupt him, and he needs to show the brat his place.

He regrets nothing.

Kagami Taiga does not deserve to stand on the same ground as he did, if he could not dodge that blow.

* * *

His hair is shorter now, and he wishes he hadn't cut it though, if only to stop Reo's incessant nagging.

He settles to watch the first match of the season, Tetsuya vs Daiki.

Tetsuya surpasses all expectations and manages to win. He smiles. Tetsuya was always the best of them all. He recalls Daiki's Zone and frowns. He needs such a trump card in case he's to face Tetsuya.

Attaining the Zone isn't a problem. He perfects it and deems it usable in games. He does not however, forget the look on Reo's face as he lay on the floor after Seijuurou defeated him.

* * *

The other games are forgettable.

He wonders what Tetsuya will do against Atsushi. It will truly be a sight to behold.

Tetsuya wins again. Seijuurou finds himself unsurprised.

He walks back with his team, thinking about how Tetsuya is destroying himself with that 'Vanishing Drive' and 'Phantom Shot'. Truly fancy names, but they would be the end of Tetsuya.

Does that idealistic fool not realise what being a shadow entails?

How disappointing.

"Akashi-kun!"

He freezes for a second before catching himself. He knows this voice.

He turns around and sees pink hair as expected.

She's panting for breath and looking happy and sad and Seijuurou prays for his control to hold, to not pull her up in his arms and, where's that idiot always loitering two inches behind her?

He smiles at her involuntarily, and wishes he didn't. The pain that flashes through her eyes when he smiled is enough to cut him like a knife.

He knows he isn't the one she wants.

She likes the other Seijuurou, the one that is weak and places stock on feelings and what not and look where _his_ weakness has led them to?

"Akashi-kun, why didn't you stay in touch?"

He continues smiling, even though he wants to scream at her.

His teammates sense the menacing aura emanating from him. They don't leave until he gives them a look though.

"Why didn't _you_?" He asks her, because why _didn't_ she? If she's truly concerned, she should have called.

"You changed your number, moved to Kyoto and didn't even tell me anything about wanting to stay in touch. What am I supposed to think? I thought you didn't want to stay in touch!"

His smile is unwavering. He knows she's making excuses. He knows she finds this changed Seijuurou despicable, but really who is she to talk of despicable when she so blatantly chose between two of her supposed best friends?

She discarded him like _trash_ for her Dai-chan.

"You changed," she tells him almost petulantly and his smile widens. He does not feel any humor, just hollow.

"Yes I changed," he admits, "but then so did you."

All of them did. Except Tetsuya, but Tetsuya was always an exceptional creature.

The girl in front of him looks wary, hesitant, hurt and confused.

"Yes, well it doesn't matter whether you changed or not. You're still my friend. You're still Dai-chan's friend. I want us to be together. Please stay in touch. Don't disappear like you always do."

He is suddenly reminded of a simpering girl who confessed to him last week. Realisation strikes with the force of lightning, and it surprisingly hurts. He declines as politely as he always does, and turns to walk away, when she tugs at his sleeve.

She might have as well tugged at his heart.

He looks at her tear-stained face and wonders what this girl desires of him. Is she like the others in life? Does she perhaps want him to talk sense into Daiki? Or is she suddenly aware that his features have taken a turn for the sensual?

He asks her as such.

The anger that twists her pretty features is genuine, and he feels refreshed by it.

Perhaps he has misjudged. Maybe there were two of them that didn't change.

He looks at the apologising girl in front of him, with regret tasting bitter as bile in his throat, because she still wants to be friends.

She's so like Tetsuya that way. They truly deserve each other. The thought sends a spike of pain in heart.

* * *

Rakuzan vs Shuutoku proceeds as planned.

He uses his eye only when Shintarou forces his hand, Shintarou who used to play shogi with him on those cold evenings when Daiki and Satsuki went off to buy conveniece store ices. It's hard to see him execute those shots with that sharp eyed point guard with the modern sounding name, shots he wouldn't be able to perform with any of the Generation of Miracles.

He's angry with the pretty point guard.

Seijuurou's anger is something to be feared after all.

They win decisively, overwhelmingly.

He does not expect Shintarou's handshake.

(Sometimes he forgets people aren't shogi pieces, that they have the ability to move and think and do not exist for the sole purpose of serving him. It's unfortunate but true.)

* * *

He needs a shower. To clear his head of Shintarou's face when he rejected that handshake, of the mess he's making with his life, because is all of this worth it?

 _"I will atone for your sins. You do not need to fear any consequences."_

There it is again. He was wondering when his 'older brother' would talk. His weak, meddlesome 'brother'.

(Sometimes he wonders if he is insane.)

He bites his lip hard, as he suppresses screams under the shower. All of this perfection, he wonders how long he can keep this up, how long until he cracks like his brother does.

His brother lasted fourteen years, he has hardly lasted two. The other times they shared personalities do not count. He wonders if his brother is going insane like he is.

If they were sane at all to begin with.

He walks out of the shower, hardly bothering to dry himself when he runs into her.

This girl will be the death of him one day.

His emotions usually run high after a match, and this particular match has picked at the raw, bleeding edges of the wound that is his and Shintarou's cautious relationship. It is not a particularly good time for his self control to be taunted with the object of his affection, but then there were always certain things beyond his control.

Satsuki's tenacious will is one of them.

Why does she not go watch her darling Tetsu-kun's match with Ryouta?

He's surprised to realise how bitter he sounds, even in his head.

She's blushing, why he does not know, but it is certainly not good for his sanity.

"Satsuki." He acknowledges her first. He wants this to be over as soon as possible.

"Good game, Akashi-kun. You played very well."

He is well aware that it was a 'good' game so to speak. He also knows that is not what she's here for.

"Will you watch the Seirin game with me?" she asks, and ducks her head quickly, just as well because he can feel his face go slack with surprise. Of all the things he expected her to say, this was not one of them. Not even close.

He's horrified to realise he's contemplating accepting her proposal, when his rational mind (not clouded by that wonderful _wonderful_ strawberry scented hair and the utter vision she makes when she's blushing) kicks in.

He's not sure he's entirely rational when he lifts her face to his.

She's too beautiful and he's not entirely the gentleman he pretends to be. He's only sixteen after all, and Satsuki is a goddess among women.

This is a bad idea.

Which is why he's as surprised as she is when he declines her with his staple politeness. Maybe he's incapable of accepting anyone anymore because he's been rejecting people for so long, he doesn't know how to say yes.

"I keep telling you Momoi Satsuki, not to push me, but you never give up do you? Go away before I do something I will truly regret." He means entirely different things than what the innocent Satsuki understands.

But he chose Satsuki for a reason, didn't he, of all the girls that he had seen. He chose Satsuki because she was the only one not intimidated by him, the only one smart enough to see through his twisted schemes, to manipulate him to suit her needs.

It is a good thing she is kind and would rather die before she could hurt even a fly.

Her eyes become steely, and that is all the warning he gets before he's being hugged by her.

He becomes very aware of the fact that he's half-naked, and that she's feminine charm in all its glory. He swallows, mouth suddenly dry.

"I miss you, Sei-kun," she says words muffled against his chest and he's gone.

(He was gone for her long before this even happened, but this just cements the fact.)

She rushes away and he wants to pull her back, enclose her in his warmth and stay like that forever.

For once his mind is blissfully blank, for once he's not planning shogi tactics, or his taking over the world speeches.

* * *

Ryouta vs Tetsuya is almost pathetically painful to watch. Ryouta makes amateur mistakes like being predictable, and he makes them in front of the observant Tetsuya. If he was the Captain of Kaijou he would be benching Ryouta until half time and deciding to launch him then.

It would not give Tetsuya enough time to analyse patterns.

However, Kaijou makes preposterous mistakes such as these, and loses. Not that, he thinks ruefully as he stares at the sobbing Ryouta, they deserve anything better.

* * *

He goes to his hotel, after a quiet dinner.

He lies on his bed, and performs his usual breathing exercises, designed to wind him down from jittery states. They don't work, as Satsuki's lips appear behind his eyelids each time he closes them.

At half past twelve, he gives in.

By 12:40, he's asleep.

* * *

The next day is like any other day.

He wakes up, performs his morning stretches, warms up, plays some basketball and showers.

Breakfast, a round of shogi and then some indulgent TV surfing.

He then opens his wallet.

His Mother, Father and a little him stare at him from the wallet. He looks at his mother's face carefully in the worn out photograph.

He wonders if it would have been different if she were alive.

 _Of course, it would be,_ his brother says in his mind. You _would have never happened,_ his brother tells him casually.

He closes the wallet with a snap and goes back to watching the pretty heroine trying to make the clueless hero fall for her.

He goes with his team to the stadium, his team looking pretty confident. He himself, is secure in his victory. Tetsuya exceeds his expectations, not his imaginations.

* * *

Ryouta is benched and Shintarou is playing a one sided game against Kaijou, when he arrives at the stadium.

They warm up, and he sizes up the rest of the members other than Seirin.

The unsightly red headed beast is there, he observes in distaste. The Captain is formidable against a strong team, but will be ultimately useless against Rakuzan, not with Reo there.

Kiyoshi Teppei is a problem, but he's injured and Eikichi can take care of that.

Chihiro will be better than Tetsuya and today he will crush Tetsuya like all others who dared disobey him.

Akashi Seijuurou is absolute. He will not be thwarted by a stamina-less shadow.

* * *

The creature comes for the tip-off instead of Kiyoshi Teppei and surprisingly manages to catch the ball and the game begins.

He makes sure to foil Tetsuya's plans early on.

He will not cease the pressure on Seirin until they bow to him in surrender.

He will not make the mistake of taking them too lightly like the others.

They shut out Seirin one by one, slowly and steadily increasing the point gap. He is satisfied with the team and their performance, but is slightly disappointed in Tetsuya. He did promise to teach Seijuurou about his way of basketball.

(He wants to shake Tetsuya, ask him if this is all he has, because certainly it's not and Seijuurou doesn't want it to end this way.)

* * *

He never should have underestimated Tetsuya.

Tetsuya overwrites Rakuzan's shadow, and he stares with cold indifference at the failed Chihiro. His teammates are quick to shun the failed shadow. He however, encourages him, and the look of hope on the older boy's face earns only disdain from him.

There is no place for weakness when one's goal is to attain victory.

* * *

The look of heartbreak on Chihiro's face when he uses him as a passing tool, would have been almost comical, if it weren't so tragic.

Slowly, and beyond all odds, Seirin start overwhelming Rakuzan and he's disappointed.

In the end, it falls on him to correct their behaviour. He will abandon them, because they do not perform to the fullest of their abilities, they are like his previous team, getting so caught up in personal failures that they do not think of what it does to their team.

No matter how much spirit Seirin may have, it isn't possible for them to win against a team like Rakuzan.

So why is Chihiro looking as if he has lost, why is Kotarou unable to pass that sorry excuse for a point guard, why have Eikichi's muscles failed him against the Iron Heart, why is Reo failing to score against that hot headed Captain?

It is his duty, to lead then to victory, so he will.

He enters the Zone.

He is hyperaware of everything, and he feels invincible.

Everyone is too slow, or maybe he's too fast. He does not know. Going coast to coast is a simple matter. Passing that upstart Kagami is child's play. Scoring is as easy as breathing.

But Tetsuya has to ruin everything, like he always does and Tetsuya of all people helps Kagami get a turnover off him.

Him, of all people.

He has never had a turnover in his life.

(Failed. He has failed. He is a failure. How could he do this? How could he call himself a Captain if he has _failed -_ )

He will stop this at all costs, he is superior to that trash Kagami any day.

He feels shocked when he is unable to.

It's a dull sort of shock, muting his usually superior senses, and making him feel sluggish, as if walking underwater.

He is out of the Zone.

Exhaustion and failure hits him full force, and he wants to fall on the court and go to sleep.

He plods on with every last ounce of energy, and he makes amateur mistakes in basic plays. Every single Seirin member is able to stop him.

 _"Give up, you're at your limit."_

No. His existence is on line here, he will not give up, he will not lose. He is absolute. He passes to Reo, and even as he does, he feels the wrongness of the pass.

 _"You cannot attain victory for us anymore. Give up."_

He stumbles, and misses a three, the first in his life.

Eikichi grabs his shirt and it is a testament of how stunned he is, that he doesn't move to remove the hand lifting him almost completely off the ground.

He deserves it anyway, being the weak person he is.

 _"I will win for the both of us. I will correct your mistakes, and bear the burden of your sins."_

"Time Out! White team!"

Seijuurou feels cold.

He walks lifelessly to the bench. He knows he's going to be benched. The first time in his life. He doesn't want to be benched. He wants to play more basketball.

The thought stuns him.

"Member change Aka-"

"Please wait, Coach," Of all the people he expects to speak in his favour, Chihiro is the most unexpected.

"You. You spoke so much about winning and all that. Now you're like this, behaving like a toddler. Do you expect us to hold your hand? You don't even feel like the person that told me to become Rakuzan's shadow. So I'm gonna ask you again, who the hell are you?"

Seijuurou's eyes widen.

 _"We have lost sight of why sought victory. Let me through. I was earlier planning to let you face defeat and have you disappear once and for all. But you my misbegotten little brother, will disappear. I don't want that to happen. I will win for both of us."_

His eyes close and open.

The world is so bright, so unlike the murky images he saw when he was trapped in the confines of his mind.

He smiles, almost reflexively.

"I'm Akashi Seijuurou, of course."

It is too late to salvage the game, but Seijuurou tries his best.

Seirin win, of course and the tight feeling pressing against his chest making him unable to breath is defeat. He shakes Tetsuya's hand, thanking him, because even though he has lost the battle, he has won the war.

His gambit has paid off, he is himself again.

As he turns to face his teammates, he realises how much he has hurt them, and in the process, their trust for him. It will be a long time before things go back to normal.

Mibuchi gives him a watery smile. "We'll make sure to win next time, Sei-chan!" he says, and Seijuurou feels all the more guilty.

"I'm sorry Mibuchi, Hayama, Nebuya and Mayuzumi. It is my fault we lost. I will resign as Captain."

They look at him in surprise.

"Akashi, you don't need to do anything like that," says Hayama.

"Yeah, well we lost because of you, we won because of you too," Nebuya says, and Seijuurou is touched.

They walk to locker room.

He closes his eyes. He feels so tired.

"Sei-kun?"

He lifts his head on autopilot, eyes widening as his brain processes too much information at once.

He looks at her hopeful face and smiles, truly smiles for the first time in two years.

She tackles him and he buries his face in her strawberry hair. He feels like he is home. He can feel her tears, hot against his shoulders and clutches her tighter. He wants to never let go.

"Welcome back, Sei-kun," she tells him and he falls for her all over again.

Later, they will have to deal with the Spanish Inquisition, itself, under Mibuchi, but for the moment both teens are blissfully oblivious of anything but the present.

* * *

 **author notes - this was already done, I just had to edit it, yet it took me so long! I'm so lazy, lol. Okay, first off, THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU AMAZING PEOPLE WHO REVIEWED, FOLLOWED AND FAVOURITED! You all rock! I'm sorry I couldn't reply each one of you, because I have such bad memory, I forget who I replied to and who I didn't. ;_; anyway, there'll be another part to this, the best part of the whole I think. It'll be up when I'm done editing it. Hopefully it doesn't take a month. Bye bye!**


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